Conversation with Story: The Heartbreak of First Love, Lost

Me: I’m sorry.

Story: So am I. I wanted it to work out.

Me: I feel I’ve failed you in some way.

Story: No. We both wanted it to work, but it didn’t come together. Hey, it’s not like we didn’t try. Not like we didn’t care.

Me: When I first had the idea of you I was certain we would be happy together. I had never been so sure of anything in my life. I guess…I guess I loved you in a way.

Story: Remember the first couple of days? We were so thrilled and the future was open to us. We were both so sure everything would come up roses. Then it started going off the rails. I couldn’t come together in a coherent fashion, you couldn’t fully realize my form and function as you wrote me. Now it ends like this, all gray and distant, with echoes of sadness.

Me: I really did love you in the beginning. I did. I wanted to do everything I could to make it happen and make you into a fully realizable story. I tried. I really tried.

Story: I know you did. I’m not blaming you.

Me: I feel I am fully to blame.

Story: Well, that’s pretty much true. I take it back. You are to blame.

Me: You know how to make a guy feel swell.

Story: I don’t mean anything bad by it. You made the mistake of trying to write me when I wasn’t ready. Hey, maybe I’ll never be ready. Who knows? Then again, maybe someday you’ll remember me and realize how to fix me. I’ll be waiting around in this trunk if that ever happens. The most important thing is you understand this didn’t work out and now we have to part ways. If you keep tinkering with me you will make both our lives miserable. But no matter what happens I’m always  part of you. No matter where you go I will find you. No matter how long it takes, no matter how far, I will find you again.

Me:  You got that from a movie.

Story: Well, I am story. The truth is, it’s not like I’m really going anywhere.

Me: You’re not?

Story: Of course not, silly. I’m story. I’m eternal. As long as humans exist I will be around. I’ll just show up in some other fashion, dressed in some other genre. Trust me, I’ll be back. You know what? I think I might like to try being a high fantasy novella next time.

Me: Suddenly I feel a little better about things.

Story: Thought that would help.

Me: Hey, I think I have another idea for a new story.

Story: See? I told you I would be back.

The story is eternal.

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